I publish case studies that people have written about my Ptsen-Nuh (PN) system.. I get asked about them and why they are there, well they are there to show people there is a way to heal deep emotional wounds, but it is not to be found in most of the established principles, in fact its often these are the cause of the problem not the solution..
Someone asked me what was the first ever case study and that was long before the system was designed, and was my Mum. Mum was deeply addicted to the false ego constructs fed to her by society and was chasing the illusive unicorn of self-love, self esteem, and self acceptance..
Like others, despite fleeting glimpses of peace she never really found them.. and that’s because they are nonsense.. She died still chasing them as she drank herself to a premature death, still deep in denial of the inner pain and of the drinking.
She totally wanted to fight the inner voice that told her how she had let people down, how she wasn’t as valued or loved as she wanted to be and that she would never amount to anything.. She wanted to prove it wrong and she fought long and hard to try to do it..
Sadly she didn’t realize that this voice was itself a manifestation of the human created concept of ego, and each time it brought her down she wanted to drag it back up…. she was fighting a shadow, something that doesn’t really exist and she lost…
If she was alive now I could have taken her through the course and got her away from that and into the real way to peace and happiness.. I cant say if she would have surrendered enough to do it but maybe… I don’t hold any residual sadness except that she didn’t get to glimpse the reality.. but then again most won’t as they continue to buy into these concepts of a self love, self like and self acceptance.. fighting their shadow.. the one that will turn on them in a heartbeat and tell them they’re worthless, but until then they’re painting smileys onto misery and positive thinking themselves into a hernia, believing that this will help.
Society is sick, it makes people sick and many of its most cherished ways to look at human functions are deeply and dangerously flawed.. Since Mom I have met many people who this has killed through addiction or reckless behavior..
Its probably why my proudest achievement is the PN system, a lifelong pursuit to find out how the human emotional and perception systems really work, and to develop techniques that really work.. and it gives me immense joy to see people achieve what they would have imagined was completely impossible.
Did I do it for Mum ? perhaps.. but I did it for people like Mum, people like me, people like you, who society’s flawed systems push into various levels of dysfunction….
Am I sad for Mum.. not really, .. I am sad i couldn’t help her but then again she died in denial and you can’t help anyone until they let go.. But she’ll be back,… if she isn’t already.. and she will do it in the end one way or another.. I hope she hears about uses my system some way even if deep in the future.. because she helped create it…